Moo7: The Bovine Bond Moovies

• From a Freisian With Love
• Thunderbull
• A Moo for a Thrill
• Udderpussy
• Cowfinger
• You Only Milk Twice
• Diamonds are for Heifers
• Man with the Bovine Pun
  
• Try Another Hay
• For Bovines Only
• Dr Cow
• Hoofraker
• Living Haylights
• Cow-pat Pie
• Live and Let Moo
• The World Is Not An Ox
  
• To Moo Now Isn't Wise
• Cattle Corral
• On Her Milkshakes Seething Surface

All these titles are available from the British Beefcasting Corporation's back catalogue, Tel: +44-1-MOO-4-YOU

RE The Paternity of Gwendoline Haggis

Dear Gwendoline,

I can understand your concern. We certainly had a fair number of groupies in the days of Oink Bros., but I would be lying if I said I didn't remember your mum and that lardonous hump in Rump City. She was a real stunner and got more than a grunt from the rest of the band too, which makes it hard to know, I'm afraid, which one of us it may be. I have attached a photo from my days in the band, can you see a resemblance to me? Please post a photo of yourself so we can apply the latest computer assisted face recognition to identify paternity, I will then be able to compare you against the other band members, whose faces, I'm afraid, I have had to obscure because they are still wanted by the government, as they survive as soldiers of fortune in the Los Angeles Underground.

Yours,
Hamilton Peck

Ham Abuse